So, apparently there is an idiot in Florida, a so-called ‘man of god’, who is holding a burn the Quran day on September 11.  His church has 50 followers.  I’m not so sure, but that doesn’t seem like so many.  I’m left to assume he isn’t the most charismatic guy ever.  But still, he’s got everyone up in arms over this.  Patreaus has weighed in, the President, Hilary Clinton.  All sorts of powerful and important people say just don’t do it.  They all say this is wrong, immoral, against what this country STANDS FOR (although really, what we stand for today is sort of unclear to me, but I’m glad to know it’s not about book burning).  In the meantime, Reverend Moron gets more media coverage than, I don’t know, than things that are probably deserving of media coverage.

As most of you know, I’m muslim.  I’m a terribly bad muslim.  I like bourbon.  I married a white. I don’t pray. I eat just about anything regardless of it’s halal or non-halal status.  I am what they probably call a ‘cultural muslim’.   I go to mosque on the high holy days and wear a hijab when I’m there.  I wear strapless dresses otherwise.  (Not everyday, obviously.)  I don’t much care for a lot of the dogma since, quite frankly, it doesn’t make sense to me and despite my love of espousing my feelings on this blog, I like things to make sense.  For example, I don’t get why God would want people to be mean and nasty and hungry and not able to function like normal human beings for one month out of every year.  I really don’t.  I know the theory is to maintain some sense of inner calm and peace and renounce earthly pleasures from sunup until sundown, but during those hours (and even afterward) regular life ceases.  Folks are just tired and hungry.

The other truth is, for a lot of muslims in this part of the world, it is the only month when any type of religious activity is done.  The rest of the year people act just like me (well, not exactly like me, I might be an extreme)  I’m not here to judge. I don’t care if you don’t eat bacon but love martini’s, or wear a bikini but won’t have a budweiser.  I ain’t God. And quite honestly, I don’t care. And I don’t speak for him, but I don’t think he does either.  There’s kind of a lot of other stuff going on what with flooding and oil spills and whatnot.

Now, the folks in the muslim countries don’t see it like that.  Despite the fact that the Islamic religious text specifically states that only God judges, well, they’ve chosen to ignore that part and stick with the ‘women in burqua and no fun ever’ portion of the Quran.  They say that if this dude, this Reverend Shit-for-Brains has this burning day of their holy book they will kill Americans. There will be more innocent blood shed.  They actually say “if we allow them to burn our book, what do we have left?”  Uhhhhh, ummm. 

The problem is that the people who say stupid crap like that actually mean it.  They mean the book itself is everything. The symbol is all.  Ironic, for a religion that doesn’t take kindly to symbols and calls things like crucifixes and statutes in churches ‘idol worship’.  The book is actually printed in a factory somewhere.  It is printed on a computer.  It is just a book.  Islam is not the book, I hope.  It is the message contained within the book, which is really not about the book at all.  Muslims get all up in arms about these things.  Like draw Mohammed Day.  I mean, really?  Your faith is so weak that someone drawing a picture can shake you?  Someone burning a book that doesn’t even belong to you (because I’m assuming you already own a copy, most likely in a language you don’t even understand) can make you KILL PEOPLE?  I am flabbergasted by this.

Come on folks, settle down.  Have a shot of maker’s and a big mac.  Now that I’ve said that, they’ll probably come after me.