I have family members who now read this blog.  I sort of wonder what they think about it, what they think about what I do.  I never talk about it so I’m not sure if they realize that I spent the majority of my adult life defending people like this or this.  I’ve had high points, and low ones too (note there is no link to the low ones).  I’ve been to federal detention centers, state prisons and local jails.  Been leared at and jeered at.  I can’t count how many people I’ve represented over the past decade, and I actually had to bow out of one contract job because the conflicts check required that I list everyone I’ve ever represented.  Unpossible!  And irrelevant.  But, I wouldn’t expect a corporate or transactional type to understand that I can’t remember the name of every middle of the night bail call I ever got. 

With family, I’ve never bragged, never talked about what I’ve done or where I’ve gone or wins or losses.  I’ve sat next to hit men while they talked about who they’ve killed and then delivered messages of love from them to their wives and kids.  It’s all in a day’s work.  I’ve even been a translator in Federal Court for Afghans who were detained for false driver’s licenses.  It was hard, especially since I don’t regularly use words like ‘bail’ and ‘forfeiture’ around the dinner table. 

In all of my years of practice, I’ve never had one single Afghan client.  Not ever.  I’ve had them call me, ask questions, try to lowball my fee (and I usually give them a pretty decent discount at that) but I’ve never gotten a paying client from my own community.  Despite the fact that I’m good at what I do, despite the fact that I give a shit and that I understand their language and culture, they’ve never hired me.  When I first started on the defense side I met with some Afghans on a federal case.  I quoted them a fee that was half of what I normally charged.  They said it was too high.  They ultimately hired an older, American born lawyer for twice what I charged. 

My family has not been a source of referrals for me.  They haven’t told people to hire me or sent me anyone who turned into a paying client.  That’s ok.  It’s probably even good that they don’t have a lot of criminal friends.  But, I have been looked over even in family related (read – FREE) cases.  I have another relative who is also a lawyer, has been practicing for many years less than me, and they go to him instead.  I don’t know why.  Even when I’ve offered to do the cases, they don’t take me up on it.  I guess I should be grateful, perhaps they think I’m too busy, or maybe its because they don’t know how awesome I am.

Maybe its better that its our little secret.