Archive for December, 2004

Life’s little ironies

In my former life, the one where I had a job and a purpose in life, I was a lawyer. A trial lawyer primarily, but to earn some extra cash I would also write appeals; you know, those things called “briefs” that all the nerdy lawyer types really get into. In the last year I [...]

Posted in: Not Gulity No Way   |     |   2 Comments

Did everyone miss the point?

See, the point of the last post was that he was saying no, you aren’t fat, but thought it would be funny to say yes because he knows I am sensitive about my weight right now and not that the answer was actually yes, you are fat because if that was the honest answer, then [...]

Posted in: Not Gulity No Way   |     |   One Comment

He thought this was funny. Men beware – This is NEVER FUNNY.

My husband is an aspiring stand up comedian. What this means is that he writes stuff down and then when I’m drunk he has me read it because when I’m drunk I think everything is funny. However, my husband the comedian cannot stand being teased. I mean absolutely cannot stand it to the point where [...]

Posted in: Not Gulity No Way   |     |   4 Comments

I am Fat – not Phat, FAT

I am now going to bitch and moan about something all women bitch and moan about at some point in their lives – I am fat. I mean it. I am not even lying. I’m not saying I’m 5’7″ and weight 125 pounds and god, I feel like a whale. I mean this person who [...]

Posted in: Not Gulity No Way   |     |   4 Comments

GARBAGE!

There is not just one new garbage can in Mt. Vernon, there are five. I rule.

Posted in: Not Gulity No Way   |     |   Leave a comment

My dog needs diapers

My dog, Sappho, is now 12 years old and she needs Depends. Yesterday we came home from going somewhere, I forgot where now. Oh, right. I went to the gym and then went to Macy’s to buy Xmas gifts for the Xtian part of the family and I ended up buying myself a dress with [...]

Posted in: Not Gulity No Way   |     |   3 Comments

I did it!

It’s 1:20 am and I am proud to announce that I finally filled in the National Conference of Bar Examiner’s online version of “my book about me”. If you had access to it (which you don’t), you could read about my professional training, jobs, education, etc. But, more importantly, you would learn some personal stuff [...]

Posted in: Not Gulity No Way   |     |   2 Comments